Beyond the Stigma: Why Asking for Help is a Man’s Greatest Strength
At the Ruach Counselling Centre, we’re all about healing and transformation. We see people from all walks of life, but we often notice one stubborn barrier that hits men harder than most: the stigma around men’s mental health.
For too long, society has pushed an old, narrow idea of what it means to be a man, someone who is tough, silent, and always has to figure it out alone. The unspoken rules are clear: "Man up," "Don't show weakness," "Just get over it," "Real men don't cry".
This outdated script isn't just frustrating; it's dangerous.
The Silent Crisis: What the Numbers Tell Us
The numbers tell a sobering story, here in South Africa and globally, that we cannot ignore:
A Tragic Disparity: In South Africa, men are up to four times more likely to die by suicide compared to women.
A Crisis Point: According to the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG), an estimated 75% of those who commit suicide in South Africa are men.
The Masking of Distress: Men often express emotional pain differently. It's not always obvious sadness; it frequently shows up as anger, irritability, withdrawal, or increased risk-taking (like drinking too much). This is often referred to as 'male depression,' and it can easily hide treatable issues like anxiety and classic depression, leading to underdiagnosis.
Waiting Too Long: The fear of being judged as "weak" stops many men from reaching out until they've hit a crisis point.
Breaking Down the Barriers
The main thing holding men back is the stigma itself. It's a double hit:
Internal Shame: The fear that admitting you're struggling means you’re less of a father, less masculine, or a burden to your partner.
External Worry: The concern over how others will react—will they support you, or will they just reinforce that "tough guy" stereotype?
Here is the vital truth we want you to know:
Asking for help isn't a sign you're failing; it's the strongest, most responsible thing you can do. It's the ultimate act of courage and self-awareness, and it’s how you protect your family, your career, and your future.
Finding Your Way to Wellness
You don't need to wait for a disaster to talk to someone. Counselling is simply a powerful tool for living a healthier, more fulfilled life. We know what it feels like when the weight of the world sits on your shoulders, and we're here to help you lift it.
It's Confidential: At Ruach, your sessions are private. You have a safe space to talk without any fear of judgment.
It's Practical: We don't just talk about feelings. We help you gain tools and strategies to manage stress, navigate tough relationships, process trauma, and make better decisions.
It's for Everything: Dealing with pressure at work? Relationship conflicts? Grief? Just feeling "off"? There's no problem too small to discuss.
What You Can Do Today:
Acknowledge the Signals: Notice when you're irritable, withdrawing, sleeping poorly, or relying on substances to cope. These are warning lights, not a personal failure.
Redefine Strength: Understand that real strength is found in your resilience and your willingness to take care of your whole self—mind, body, and spirit.
Take the First Step: A simple phone call or email is all it takes to schedule a confidential appointment.
Your mental health is just as important as your physical health. If you'd see a doctor for a broken bone, please see a counsellor for a struggling mind.
Please don't try to handle this alone. The team at Ruach Counselling Centre is ready to meet you where you are with confidential, compassionate support.
Contact the Ruach Counselling Centre today for an appointment:
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